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Man 2 Man: A Gay Man's Guide to Finding Love (Documentary)

By Golu
Finding love for gay men has never been easy. Even though this documentary came back in 2011 and I am only seeing it now more than 10 years later, a lot of topics being discussed here are still very relevant. I know that most of us gay men are always looking for the next best thing, or we may be dealing with our own childhood issues trying to push ourselves back in the closet etc, which makes it hard for us. This documentary tries to shed light on why many gay men have the desire to be in long-term relationships, but sometimes find it difficult to make them work. Understanding the effort and commitment required, along with the rewards, of a long-term relationship is important for many gay men and couples.

Through interviews with gay men currently looking for the "one" and discuss the struggles they find from within the community and themselves.  Also featured are a married couple from Massachusetts who discuss the methods they have used over their long-term relationship, including being sexually non-monogamous for a period of time, only to return to being exclusively monogamous. The documentary also provides a brief history of how gay men have traditionally and currently seek out relationships, including how gay men are often early adopters of new technology to that end.  The founders of Manhunt, Grindr and MyPartner.com provide interviews how they came to found their companies and how they feel they are impacting the gay community. Possibly the most informative part of the documentary is the statistical data which indicates that 80% of gay men are seeking a long-term relationship, but only 1/3 have found one.  The reasons for this according to the experts can include a variety of factors, with one of the main ones being childhood isolation that many gay men experience. Since there are fewer accurate representations of gay life growing up, gay men often undergo a second adolescent sexual awakening once they come out.  The result is that in comparison to their straight counterparts, gay men are starting long-term relationship game late.

True in terms of finding a man, the gay community has always been ahead of the game, even using technology. Yet do any of these mediums actually work for love, as against sex? For some; undoubtedly. For others; not so. So, the point is, for whilst physical attraction undoubtedly plays a vital part, falling in love with the person, as against the body beautiful, is what makes for a lasting bond. The documentary also seeks the advice of a series of psychologists and experts in the field of matchmaking, before turning to those truly in the know, namely a set of committed same-sex couples who share every day of their life together, in a monogamous loving relationship. Professionally shot and edited and packed with a sensual array of muscular men buffed to perfection, the film concludes with a list of summary points on how to find and equally keep your man. All of which makes for a wonderfully informative, if at times somewhat stating the obvious feature. But the biggest of them question still stays "Are you looking to get laid, or are you looking to fall in love?" (5/10)
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