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I'll Turn Back This Time (Chinese Series)

By Golu
To make sure that this show gets a proper release (given restrictions around BL content in China), the makers of this show partnered with A Singapore studio to get around the usual restrictions and censorship that would have otherwise been imposed on it. The core of the story are our two lead actors who play stepbrothers Gu Shi and Shen Nan, who face adversity after falling in love with each other. The show has 6 episodes of about 45-50 minutes each and a final 10 minute special episode after. The problem with the story is the ending, which feels incomplete or even worse makers not knowing what would be the best way. Anyway, more on that later.

Shen Nan, a dentist by profession, has taken sometime off from work and is visiting his father. There he meets a woman whom his father is set to marry who has a son named Gu Shi. After initial head butting, the two boys warm up to each other and a special bond starts to develop between the two, almost an unrequited love, but soon Gu Shi dies in a tragic road accident. Heartbroken Shen Nan cries deep and before you know he has a special pendant that takes him back in time 3 months ago. Shen Nan is told by himself that his love for Gu Shi can never be realized. Fate has determined otherwise as their love for one another is ‘cursed’. If he continues to love Gu Shi, he will die. Thinking he has learned from his past mistake, Shen Nan wants to try a new approach. He slowly befriends the young boy and helps him realize his dream of wanting to be an artist. Soon they both start to fall hard for each other and are madly in love, but Shen Nan still dreams that Gu Shi will decide. Their relationship is even opposed by their parents who eventually give in. But Shen Nan fears that Gu Shi may die so he also decides to break up but eventually love come out stronger and he cannot keep himself away from Gu Shi. Gu Shi wins the best artist prize and the same day he dies when a heavy light falls on him. Hoping that he will get another chance to change the fate, Shen Nan uses his pendant one last time to go back in time, this time promising himself that he will not fall in love with him and will control. This time destiny brings them both close many times, but Shen Nan always ignores him. He writes 10 letters to be sent to Gu Shi every year on his birthday without revealing his identity. Gu Shi lives on and Shen Nan is happy to see that. In the special episode we see that likely Gu Shi was always aware of Shen Nan's existence when he finally asks him "How long are you going to ignore me"

While it certainly is a love story, this is not a BL. It never reaches any level of a serious degree of romance or deep sense of passion. And in fact, since it is Chinese, its underlying message might be of a subtle tale that whispers this type of relationship is, as it is stated, cursed and therefore wrong. The story is good and has potential, but somehow I am not sure what really was the underlying message. Yes, the fate had decided that they will never meet and they don't but is the message to show that being gay means you will be cursed? I certainly hope not. As an added twist, the production company provided an 8-minute epilogue, certainly worthy of attention, but equally confusing as the narrative itself. Of course, do not even try to think the details of science behind all this. It will confuse you even more. The two main protagonists are the force behind this series. While both display boyish charm, there is also an intensity about whom each portrayed. Shen Nan projected an aura of gloom about him, knowing that inevitable can happen anytime to his love. While Gu Shi is shown as innocent yet pensive and unsure. Unfortunately, although it had a good cast, the script wasn't strong and the execution was a mess. It had lots of things that were never explained properly, and most of it was left to the viewer to fill in the blank, which, my brain did not do, so I ended up with more questions than answers. All in all a decent one time watch, but with an unsatisfying ending that leave you with more questions. The series works mostly because of the charming leads. (6/10)
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